how this journey began

I feel a little regretful that I did not really get a chance to share with people how, why and what this trip to China is all about. The only person that knows everything I know is probably my dearest boyfriend. The One above knows a lot more than I do about what is going on. I didn't want to say much because it was scary and painful to talk about something that I was not sure was going to happen... and could not explain very well.

Several months ago, when the team was sharing on m-sunday about their dec trip, and there was mention of a teaching trip this year, I was very interested... mainly because it seemed like a good idea to do something more than 2 weeks. But as things rolled around and it was not at a good timing, and I wanted to actually leave work after July, I was not too sure that I wanted to do it, especially when there was nobody in charge, and it looked at though there would not even be a the opportunity to go.

But somehow, I persevered in trying to make this happen. I did things I was totally unsure about... leaving work, talking to random uncles, emailing and calling and mostly just doing alot of "warfare". Troubles came aplenty in the form of requests to stay longer at work, visa issues that wouldn't work out, people dropping out of the trip (leaving just me and one uncle)... and the whole issue of travelling alone. But throughout these problems that really left me wondering what the One above was thinking.... I had encouragement in the form of support from people around (without me asking), andjust confirmation after confirmation that I was meant to do this.

Leaving the people behind in Singapore to be obedient was, is not and won't be easy (since my journey is not even half-way complete). Especially not being able to go to US with Hozea... especially not being around when he looks for a job... it's tough not being around when DGs start in motion, when the discipling starts, when my new nurture class is in, when my friends are also going through job changes... But I just know that there's something to it when David declares "I will NOT offer up something that costs me nothing". So I plod on... because the sacrifice of a ready heart is pleasing.. and I want to please Him.

The best miracle that "sealed the deal" was obtaining my visa in HK. Through great maneuvering by the One above, I met Uncle TH in Guangzhou, after telling Kel and the HK team that I was considering applying for a visa in HK at the embassy. I was directed to a travel agency and with a lot of grace and wonders... managed to get double-entry 30 days to China. Yes, this means I will have to travel in and out of Liannan by myself at least once. But this is such a blessing. I recall Serene saying that a month is a long time at the airport.. and I shocked her by saying that "Gd-willing, I'll be gone for 3 months". And lo and behold, it was.

Now it's my last day in Changsha and the emotions are very real. I am afraid. Truly a little disturbed at trying to find my way from Yangshuo to Liannan... and then the little outward bound trip to HK and back... But He who brought me so far, would not forsake me. =) I can trust the HS to add faith where I lack.

Thanks for all the requests made on my behalf to Him... I appreciate it cos I know that i've been buffered by grace all along.